How to (not) get married in Germany

DISCLAIMER: This my personal experience of how I (a Canadian) married my German spouse in Denmark in 2011 and avoided the insanity of attempting to get married in Germany as a foreigner.

I am unable to provide any further marriage in Denmark information or assistance than the information provided below.

Speaking from experience, (as a non-EU citizen) trying to get married to a German in Germany is as impossible as it is frustrating. The mountains of completely unnecessary paperwork; running from this office to that office; getting all of the certified documents within a specific time frame; trying to get a Ledigkeitsbescheinigung – a certified letter  from a government office in your home country confirming  your single status – something that the German authorities insist on having BUT does not actually exist outside of Germany, (the Canadian embassy now offers a “Certificate in lieu of non-impediment to marriage certificate for German registrar” for a fee) the list is as confusing as it is endless. This video made by the talented &  clever Andrew Bossum (aka rewboss) illustrates all of the insanity perfectly (although rewboss is an EU citizen & had to jump through a few less hoops than those of us without EU passports)


As funny (& unbelievable) as that video is, it is totally, completely true. There is even more madness if you are from a country outside of the European Union. Several times during our research into getting married in Germany I was either screaming at the total idiocy of “required” documents that I couldn’t get unless I teleported to Canada to retrieve them in person or I was sprawled on the floor in a weepy mess at the sheer hopelessness of the situation. All I wanted to do was marry the man of my dreams & live happily ever after but the evil wicked witch of German Bureaucracy kept holding me back. Luckily my Fairy Godmother Internet saved the day (& my sanity) once again.

Did you know that Denmark is the Las Vegas of Europe??  It’s true my lovelies – minus the Elvis impersonators – for a fraction of the cost & with only 2 weeks notice you can be married on a beautiful island in Denmark! It’s even cheaper & quicker if you marry on the mainland but we decided that we deserved a bit of beauty , romance & relaxation for our wedding.

After loads of research our choice for  wedding coordinator was Danish Island Weddings of Aero Island. Their website is very informative (in German & English), and the owner, Louise Moloney, extremely helpful. All of our inquiries were answered the same day & our wedding was completely planned (including travel & accommodation) in about 2 weeks.

*We chose the Express Offer which includes the Apostille service (The  Apostille certification stamp/signature is necessary for the marriage certificate to be recognized in Germany & internationally)

* Unfortunately in addition to birth certificates & passports the Ledigkeitsbescheinigung is still required for the marriage to be valid in Germany. As I said above, this document does not exist in other countries & no matter how many times you ask for it your embassy will not give it to you because it DOES NOT EXIST OUTSIDE OF GERMANY!

*UPDATE 2013: The Canadian embassy now offers a “Certificate in lieu of non-impediment to marriage certificate for German registrar” for a fee.

I got mine by complete flukey luck (& it may work for you too!):  I happened to go to the Bürgeramt with my fiance on the day he went to get his Ledigkeitsbescheinigung. We went to the appropriate desk when our number was called, my man showed his ID & as we live together & are BOTH on the Anmeldebescheinigung (address registration) the wonderful woman behind the desk asked if we BOTH needed a Ledigkeitsbescheinigung. We quickly nodded & for a mere €10 we had flown over the last German Bureaucratic hurdle!

 

As we were married in November the weather wasn’t wonderful but rain on your wedding day is good luck, at least according to the inhabitants of Aero Island, Denmark!

I found The Harmoni Guesthouse on the ‘net. We booked their lovely wedding package which included the honeymoon suite, bridal bouquet, champagne breakfast(s) & the wedding feast for 6 – a great deal! (Breakfast was also included for our guests!)

We purchased our personalized wedding cake topper here. and our wedding cake here.

Getting married in Germany Denmark was really that easy! If you are a foreigner wishing to marry a German I highly recommend leaving behind all of the bureaucratic B*llsh*t of Germany and spending a day or 2 (or more) having a short but sweet ceremony in Denmark!

wall street journal denmark weddings article

Thanks to my candid, honest & amusing blog post I was interviewed by the Wall Street Journal about my Denmark wedding experience – check out the online version of the article here.

click here to check out all of my Life in Germany adventures.

12 Comments

  1. I came across your blog post in late 2016 when I was trying to navigate the bureaucracy of organizing my own wedding, as a Brit and a US couple residing in Germany (Berlin). Thanks for documenting your struggles here! In the end we did as you did and went to Denmark, and had a brilliant experience. Not quite as smooth as yours as we didn’t go through an agency, but definitely less faff involved than if we’d have just done it in Germany.

    With the greatest respect I’ll share a link here, as I also wrote about our marriage in Denmark, for others in a similar predicament: https://twitchett.github.io/blog/2017/04/15/how-to-get-married-in-denmark

    1. Thanks for sharing your post 🙂 As I was married in 2011 it’s fab to have a more recent experience for readers to get info from too 😉

  2. Cameron Gagne says:

    I am an American trying to figure all this out, relating so accutely to your just wanting to marry the man of your dreams and live happily ever after! So, to Denmark we go!! Thank you so much for your candidness. Congrats on the happily-ever-after solution, and all of my best to you and your Mann (and your little one!)! 🙂 Vielen Dank! – Cameron (soon-to-be) Kurz 😉

    1. You’re very welcome! Pretty much everything in Germany is frustratingly ridiculous & unnecessarily bureaucratic for non-Germans, grrr! I wish you a lovely wedding in Denmark & much happiness in your marriage! 😀

  3. Hey.. I thinking to go to Denmark also to marriage, here in Germany is so difficult…but I have a question, after your marriage, you have to register in the Standesamt?I read about many people the standesamt don’t recognize his marriage in Denmark. What happen after yours?
    Thanks a lot!

    1. We had no problem registering our marriage at the Standesamt as we had The Apostille certification stamp/signature that is necessary for the marriage certificate to be recognized in Germany & internationally.

  4. Roundandaround81 says:

    I agree. I also married a German citizen in Denmark, yet I am not a Canadian nor a US citizen, but from Panama so for me things get a bit more complicated than for you fellas, since I have to go back to my country of origin and apply for a Family reunification visa. I went to the Ausländer Behörde here in Berlin and they told me so, plus they said “some folks do get to Germany on tourists visas and get married and shazam! residence right away!…”. Yet I agree Danish were so uncomplicated to have all arranged and all. My documents had to be translated from Spanish but after that all went great! Cheers and keep posting more stuff, the video was hilarious!

  5. Petar says:

    hi, what do u mean by
    “Unfortunately in addition to birth certificates & passports the Ledigkeitsbescheinigung is still required for the marriage to be valid in Germany. ”

    Do you need this paper anyway even if married in Denmark?

    1. Although we married in Denmark, we still needed to get the Ledigkeitsbescheinigung & give it (along with our birth certificates & passports) with our marriage application to our Denmark wedding coordinator, Danish Island Weddings.

      *I’m not a German/Denmark marriage expert by any means, the above article was strictly my own personal experience as a Canadian marrying a German in Denmark.

  6. B and A from USA says:

    Using Danish Island Weddings was a beautiful experience in a beautiful and unique setting. Everything was absolutely perfect.

  7. Thanks for your fantastic comment! Marrying in Denmark was absolutely the right decision…it’s great to know I’m not alone in my frustration with German bureaucracy! =O)

  8. Tierlieb says:

    I just had to laugh at the video and your description of getting married in Germany. I will never understand why the Germans have to make everything so difficult. I, too, live in Germany and am married to a German.

    I already lived here as a teen on a base and even back then, the young soldiers marrying German women would marry in Denmark. I am glad I remembered that… as that information helped me when I was ready to get married.

    My husband and I married in Aabenraa, Denmark and enjoyed our honeymoon there as well. The Danish are so uncomplicated concerning the paperwork and after gathering the papers we needed, we were required to reside 3 days in Denmark before the wedding. The wedding was held at a Danish town hall and was very elegant and lovely. Returning back to Germany, I just had to show the authorities the Danish marriage certificate which is also in many different languages (even that is uncomplicated if we were to move to another foreign country… no translations needed.) Everything was accepted here in Germany with no problems.

    The Germans authorities just love bureaucracy… too many state employees would be jobless if they would make things easier on the general public.

Comments are closed.

Check out these fab posts too!